Sweet, sour or just a little too smooth, there’s all types of guys out there. Many of them, unfortunately, aren’t the ones you deserve. Before meeting my lovely hubby, Andrew, I came across all kind of bad seeds— the kinds you don’t bring home to mom. On the upside, I gathered tons of valuable dating wisdom that I've used to help others recognize the red flags of bad boyfriends. It’s time, dear friends, you learn the ones to avoid.
The “I’m the best” guy
Arrogant and loud-spoken, this guy has more ego than love to give. It’s easy to fall for him because his charisma and high-energy can be attractive. But be warned: he'll always put himself first and isn't built with enough empathy and thoughtfulness to consider your needs when it counts.
You’ll notice his egotistical side in times where you need support or a confidence boost— he can’t provide it. Maybe it’s when you need to prepare for a job interview or simply want to be told your smart or beautiful. He won’t be capable of lifting you up because he’s too self-absorbed and at times, even jealous. He’s a red flag!
The bored guy
Bored guys pursue relationships for entertainment—not love! Relationships are about compromise, care and respect, but a bored guy who’s just swimming through dates for fun, is not able to provide the deep level of emotional investment you need.
He craves relationships that feel new, exciting and carefree because he needs constant stimulation. He'll use dating to distract himself from his problems, so he don’t have to face his real issues, like his fear of being vulnerable or incomplete. He's not ready for someone like you.
The immature guy
I like to call this Peter Pan Syndrome. He’s not ready to grow up and stays in his own Neverland world, filled with games and amusement. He doesn't mean to disappoint you, but at the same time, he isn't ready to take care of your feelings.
It can feel exciting to be with this type; he'll know how to flirt and make you laugh. But once you want something more serious from the relationship, he can’t provide it. He's just not mature enough. Since his actions are often impulsive and self-interested, he’s not ready to leave his la-la-land of playtime and have mature conversations about love, family and loyalty. Don’t bet your heart on the immature guy.
The selfish guy
Arguably the most dangerous type, the selfish guy will only make you feel special when it suits him. The entire relationship flows on his terms, often ignoring your needs and values.
If he’s in the mood to appear generous, perhaps he’ll take you for a nice dinner or meet your friends, but only if the task benefits him in some way. For example, if he knows he’ll need a date for his buddy’s wedding next month, he’ll start warming up to you, be it hand-holding or doing favors. This way, he knows you’ll be more attached and welcoming for the time he needs you most.
Don’t confuse his charm for love— it’s selfishness.
Watch out for these red flags to protect yourself from dating the wrong guys. The signs aren’t always easy to see clearly, but when you put your smart-girl-glasses on, you’ll see it all! Good luck friends.